Remembrance Day
by Mamajules12
Summary: November 11, 1961 Jean reflects on her past during the war and looks forward to the future with her favorite veteran.


Jean marked the calendar before starting to pour out the tea, November 11th, a day of remembrance. There are so many that she can recall that deserve a thanks; her father, uncles, her two Christophers, Matthew, Cec, and countless other names that are familiar in the town. But the one that is on her mind the most is the man still stretched out in their bed feigning sleep so that she will return to bed to wake him.

Late last night, having finally made his way home, weary from the case Lucien whispers in Jean's ear _I have plans for us tomorrow _before drifting off to sleep. As she fills the cups she can't help wonder if Lucien is aware of the date or if his plans are merely because he has been consumed with the latest case for days; a way to make it up to her. Either way she is certain how he will want to start the day and she has every intention of giving him exactly what he wants.

She places his tea cup on the bedside table keeping her eyes fixed on Lucien's face. She notices the slight twitch at the corner of his mouth as he tries not to smile while pretending to sleep. Before putting her cup down she takes a long sip of the hot liquid, enjoying watching Lucien squirm trying to keep up the pretense of sleep while she makes him wait.

Allowing her robe to fall in place, Jean slips back into bed wrapping her arm around his bare chest as the other snakes underneath him. "Pity you are so tired this morning?"

In a moment, Lucien is covering her body with his, the pair are laughing as if they were teenagers romping in the hay loft. "I'll give you tired, Mrs. Blake."

"Please do, Doctor."

"Lucien, what are the plans for the day? I'd like to know how I should dress." She continues to rinse off as he steps in the shower behind her. Jean never tires of the comfort, the level of intimacy that she shares with Lucien. There are times when the guilt still creeps into her that she didn't share the same kind of intimacy with Christopher but then she reminds herself it isn't fair to either husband to compare her marriages. It isn't just that her husbands are so very different but she is different, changed through time and knowledge. The Blake men gave her the latter.

"I thought we might just get in the car and drive." He reaches over to grab the soap as she spins to face him.

"Just drive? That's your plans for today?"

The steam is thick, he bends to kiss her deeply with a reverence that she can feel in her core. Her hands trace the corded scars along his back. The feel of them still fill her with such emotion even after all these months of marriage; pride in his survival, sadness for his pain, anger for his torment, love for his strength. She can understand if today he just wants to drive towards the sun, leaving the past behind. "That's not all. Now you better get out of here or we will never get out of the house."

Jean slips on her favorite blue cardigan as Lucien saunters over to her with his tie in hand wearing his boyish grin. "Do you want help with that?"

"Would you mind, darling? You do it so much better than me."

"I hardly think so Lucien. You seemed to manage just fine with your ties all these years." Her fingers trace the nape of his neck as she tucks the silk under the collar.

He looks down at her, watching the creases in her brow as her nimble fingers weave and fold it together in a perfect knot. "Only because I had to but now I have you."

Her hand runs down the length of the tie, marveling at the hard muscular chest and slight swell of his well fed stomach that is hers to love. "Yes, you have me."

Lucien's hands move from her shoulders where he had been absently rubbing them to cradle her face. "You know what? Why don't you pack us an overnight bag? Let's make the most of the weekend."

"You want me to pack a bag? Just like that we are going to go away overnight?" She laughs. Four months of travel taught her to embrace his spontaneity.

"Why not? We have no one to answer to but us." The twinkle in his eye along with his mischievous grin peaks Jean's own sense of adventure.

As she throws together a bag there is a tug in the back of her mind that today should be a day of reflection to all that have served and not a day of skating off for a day of whimsy. _Stop this Jean. This is for him, who sacrificed so much in his life. This is what he wants. This is what they all sacrificed for, the freedom to be happy._

One last turn around the house, a note on the table for Matthew, and Jean locks the door behind her. Lucien is waiting in the running car, the radio playing, a little too loud, a familiar tune that has him singing and tapping his fingers along. In moments like these Jean feels thirty years younger with not a care in the world. Her boy waiting to whisk her away. This is a gift he doesn't realize he gives. A taste of a youth that she never quite had. A freedom to be carefree at times, to be a bit wild, reckless without the guilt of the church or propriety ruling her life.

Jean is so lost in the song on the radio, eyes closed with the sun on her face, that she doesn't realize that Lucien is slowing the car down until it stops. "What is it Lucien?"

He nods his head towards the cemetery behind Sacred Heart. "Thought you might want to stop here before we head out of town."

Leave it to him to show her he remembers the day in this way. The tears pool in her eyes as she swallows hard to hold them back. "Come with me?"

"Of course."

"What direction my darling?" He asks, starting the car.

"Your plan really was just to drive." she laughs. "Oh, let's go south."

Not even thinking when saying _south_ that their car will pass her old farm. The road they are traveling so familiar to her. Lucien's fingers entwine with hers resting on her knee. She squeezes it a bit harder, as if joined they have a strength together that neither would have on their own.

They have talked of their past lives to one another. Silly stories that come out about childhood and children, tender antidotes of loved ones gone, past sins and follies of youth but the war years are difficult to discuss. Lucien shares bits with her that she fits together like a puzzle. The memories, though nearly twenty years past, are still so raw to give the whole picture at once.

"Jean, how was it for you? The war?"

She pauses watching the familiar fields go by. Deep down she knows that whatever they endured on the home front was nothing compared to what Lucien went through. But yet, she doesn't want to lie to him creating a rosy picture of valor. He will never judge her words, words she has never spoken to anyone always being a picture of resilience. "Hard Lucien, very hard and lonely."

He pulls over the car, turning towards her so much love in his face. "Tell me please."

"I tried, I tried so hard to make everything alright. I was alone with two young boys. My parents gone. Christopher Jr. was so withdrawn and Jack so wild. I just wanted to protect them from all the hardship, from my sadness. I did everything I could to try and keep the farm running but there was no rain or help. There were times when I hated Christopher for leaving us but I just kept thinking it will be better when he gets home. Then when the knock came on my door I knew it wasn't going to get better. There was no money, no crops to make money. I would go without eating so the boys would have food but there never was enough. That's when your father intervened. I hadn't even realized I was making myself so unwell till I nearly collapse in the vestibule of the church. I started working a couple days a week for your father, made enough to feed us, take care of the boys."

"But not keep the farm." she shakes her head. "Oh, Jean." He pulls her closer to wipe the tears away. There is more to the story that need not be spoken.

"Lucien, do you ever wonder why us?"

"What do you mean, darling?"

"So many lost their lives. So many still struggle daily to get by on their own. Lives forever shattered. Why are we given this second chance?"

"We deserve this Jean."

"And others don't?"

Lucien takes a moment because she is right, everyone deserves happiness. He cups her cheeks so that she has to look him in the eyes making her believe his words. "Maybe this is all some bigger plan. Just maybe all we went through was leading to this very moment. This moment when I tell you that I love you more than anyone in the world. I can't tell you how many times I felt like I didn't deserve to be alive but I don't feel that anymore, not with you beside me, loving me." Then in a grand jesture he states rather loudly. "Together, Jean Blake, nothing can stop us."

She can't help but start laughing at her darling husband, which starts him to laugh along with her. Jean thinks he may be right as right as any other reason. That all that came before led to this moment; giving them the ability to rejoice in the happiness that is before them. "Let's drive my love."


End file.
